finding closure with the hick

You remember about that ex I told you about, who was kinda crazy and a hick...well here's the new development (don't worry when I don't update this thing in a while that just means I'm going on adventures and what an adventure this one is...).  A couple months ago like late May or early June... I had reconnected with that crazy hick and while talking to him over the phone (he was living in another state), I heard his crazy ex gf call him slow and a retard (after living with him, I do have to admit he was slow) it pissed me off so bad that I was going to go up there and whip the girls ass, I in essence forced him down here to get him away from her because I had to listen over the phone to him being terrified of the girl cause she would beat the shit out of him and he doesn't believe in hitting women, and he was running and what not.  I was very concerned for him because yes I did have deeply rooted feelings for him.  So he came down here and we meet in a state inbetween and our mutual friend who I had just met jumps into his car with him.  Not even 5 mins in the car and he gets hauled off to jail, so the cop pissing me off, I decided to do the most sensible thing, bail his ass out of jail for a pretty penny.  Hick comes to stay with me and we work on getting to know each other and in that process of getting to know each other, he crawls up my butt, roots his tendrils in there and practically dies there.  He was like a  puppy who just found the kingdom of heaven and all the bones he can chew on.  Slowly I find myself falling out of love with him and don't really realize it till recently.  I know he came back for me, so I try and stick it out.  It had gotten to the point where he pissed me off cause he just wanted to go everywhere with me (yes he's the clingy type).  Last night I decide to join a lesbian dating website and met a girl (I'll explain in a later post).  I told the hick this and he gets all depressed and mopy on me like a whipped puppy.  Today I had met the girl and find that I really like her cause she's got a fantastic personality.  and he gets home from school and says he's going to take a shower and says to me 'you can always join me,' I tell him no because I'm lesbian and I really like the girl I met today.  he says to me 'that's not something I wanted to hear.'  He gets out of the shower and starts to fight with me, saying I was wrong for forcing him to come down here and making him lose his job (which he himself stated he could get back) and any other thing to say to make me feel bad.  He gives me that look, that strong look in the eyes like trying to make me look away, assure his masculinity and I stare him down, this is the same shit he did when we had broken up the first time 4 years ago and I wasn't about to back down.  I told him when he first came down that I wanted to take it slow because I have alot of emotions to work through and that I can't gaurantee its gonna work out between us.  I didn't toy with his heart, I did not allow him to touch me, hug me or fuck him.  He kept trying to insist on getting back into a relationship and I had to reinforce what I had told him.  I should have left his ass up there, left well enough alone because we just went down the same goddamn road.  but had I left well enough alone then my 'what-ifs' would not have been satisfied.... take the good with the bad I suppose but at least now I know.... *sigh*